For my first post on this site I thought I'd share this. I wrote this quick backplot while bored with my life. It was partially inspired by the thought of a game, partially by religious (please don't be frightened of this, its easy to swallow) and philosophical politics. I would love to see this come to life as I believe it leaves much for an in depth story, so if anyone is interested let me know. A far as what kind of feedback I would like, I would like to know what people think of the story in terms of realism and originality. Here goes: History of Neo-Zen Zen is not Zen per se, but a more likable easy pop version of it. Here are a few characteristics of it- In Zen one seeks a state of pure enlightenment or Satori in Chinese. Satori means state of no mind, where one does not think about the world - he just is. In this Zen state we do not attach ourselves to anything, we just are. We do not attach ourselves to thought, objects, or people. We do not believe in or depend on any absolute, including the rule of non-attachment. To become a master of Zen is to be completely at peace with one's self and the world around us. They took an idea, that turned into a belief, that turned into a religion, that became an institution, that turned the ideas into morals, that then became rules, that then became laws. And from those laws was born the device to enforce those laws - Government. So my ancestors took an idea called Zen. It wasn't popular at all at the time, but people soon found they liked the idea. Through generations Zen was handed down by word of mouth and became a way of life taught to believers of the idea. Soon vast communities of Zen believers began to gather on certain occasions. They built peaceful domed structures with beautiful waterfalls and gardens that hosted the gatherings. Soon the Zen-Followers built their homes to the likeliness of the great beautiful temples with the flowing waterfalls and beautiful gardens. Decades pass and the ancestors found themselves becoming offended on a deep level when followers did not practice the core principals of Zen, so they created a written code of the principals of Zen. The Zen (as the code was called) still survives to this day, although not as widely followed I might add. It was a way of life that allowed them to prosper in peace and dignity. But then something happened - individualism was born into the society of the Zen Followers and some people were not following The Zen way of life. So the Zen followers put the code into law, that made consequences for those who blatantly ignored The Zen. They created the system of elected officials that managed the laws of the state that is the base for what we have today. The Government created prospered and grew and welcomed all outsiders under the condition that they follow the core laws created from the morals of that belief. And then, something funny happened. To appease the new people who had their own religion, the government that was born of the rules that were created form the morals that the people learned through their religion, separated the religion from the state. The Government and the people became two separate entities. OK, so a hundred years later and outsiders start to see how truly great the essence of the Zen culture was. They immigrated in droves, bringing their own beliefs, morals, and religions with them.This caused much strife and conflict, and since the Zen Followers were not ones to kick the immigrants out, they proposed that they change the Government to incorporate all of the different moral standards that everyone held. Through much debate the Zen Followers decided that the core reason for the unhappiness was that the government laws were based on the Zen moral system. They concluded that these laws should have nothing to do with religion and they were just rules to follow while living in the state. So the Zen Followers declared that from then on the government's laws were based on rules that kept everyone living in harmony, not based on the principles of Zen idealism. This is an important part of our history to take note of. We have our citizens that follow the moral code because it is part of their religious idealism, but we have a government that severed the link between morals and laws. In the beginning it didn't matter too much because the laws still strongly reflected the morals. But when new laws were made... well, you'll see... The Government trying not to let their religion guide them started to make immoral decisions, these immoral decisions started to make the Government look immoral and corrupt in the eyes of the still quite religious and moral people. We started noticing a change in how things were run. Our elected officials started lying to us, telling us what we needed to hear. They told us they were still the same people, they still followed The Zen, but they weren't. They became Politicized Zens with a heavily distorted view from ours. How could it not be? In order to get elected, they had to be Zen Followers to us, but in order to get us what we wanted out of our government they had to go from an explicitly un-Zen stand point. Hence their view became (much to their misery I might add) highly contradictory of it's self. The first generation of politicos were distraught and were afraid to do what was needed to keep our growing state stable, they did nothing but keep the status quo. The next generation of politicians was where it started going downhill. We needed schools, we demanded an education to better ourselves. So they gave them to us. But the government ran the schools that did not teach the moral people's children the moral laws the government was originally based off of. It had to teach it's future citizens how to live well and happy within the system's boundaries. An ever growing rift between each generation developed. Each generation lost a bit of their morality from their teachings. Each generation horrifying it's predecessor. Here I sit, two-hundred and fifty years later, witness to a small part of our destructive cycle started back when our government abandoned our ideals. Small part, but big enough to get an idea of exactly how destructive of a cycle. We are in a cold standoff, us versus them. Us versus the outsiders destroying Zen, us versus the Government that has become so powerful it can be felt seeping into every capillary and pore of our society, us pitted against ourselves. It's no mystery to me how we got this way. Simple logic really. When our government abandoned our ideals and then gave us schools, we no longer had that much control over what we taught our offspring, we especially lost that ability when they required the young to go to school. Had to keep everyone smart and following the law. Well, the next part goes like this - those kids raised, taught, and socialized in the government schools grew up smart and strong. Some of them became our next politicians. They had learned to be better politicians than the last batch before them. Their views were a little more distorted and they changed some laws here and there. Small steps. They changed some laws having to do with the economy, some with the judicial system, and some with the education system. More requirements here, more restrictions there. Their successors were terrifying from an absolute perspective, but they were simply just acceptably worse than their predecessor from a relative point of view. As far as society (as opposed to what was happening inside the government) ... it went down the shit hole, for lack of better imagery. We thought it was just the pretentious teenager years, raging hormones and all that jazz. But every generation managed to horrify it's preceding generation in completely new ways every time. Nobody thought to ask what the hell was going on in those schools. Complacency has since replaced curiosity. They never got better, just worse. A cycle of the blind leading the blind if you will, is what has really been happening. This cycle started over ten generations ago. That's a lot of revolutions in our little spinning social cog. But the time for talk is drawing to an end, its time to act. Didn't you know? A revolution is starting. [Edited by - Ouoertheo on March 23, 2006 4:07:34 PM]

Quote: Original post by Ouoertheo
For my first post on this site I thought I'd share this.
I wrote this quick backplot while bored with my life. It was partially inspired by the thought of a game, partially by religious (please don't be frightened of this, its easy to swallow) and philosophical politics.

I would love to see this come to life as I believe it leaves much for an in depth story, so if anyone is interested let me know.

A far as what kind of feedback I would like, I would like to know what people think of the story in terms of realism and originality.

Rather well written, but many passages are too illogical and the whole story is (for me) hard to believe: Zen is unlikely to devolve in the ways you describe because it emphasizes the exact contrary attitudes: meditation and not sacred texts, individual enlightenment and not institutions, etc.
Try to apply the same ideas to a more suitable ideology, even if you need to sacrifice most of your milieu.

Quote: Here goes:

History of Neo-Zen
Zen is not Zen per se, but a more likable easy pop version of it.

Do you really need a simplification? What would you change, and why?

Quote: Here are a few characteristics of it-
In Zen one seeks a state of pure enlightenment or Satori in Chinese. Satori means state of no mind, where one does not think about the world - he just is. In this Zen state we do not attach ourselves to anything, we just are. We do not attach ourselves to thought, objects, or people. We do not believe in or depend on any absolute, including the rule of non-attachment. To become a master of Zen is to be completely at peace with one's self and the world around us.

Nice summary, but you later fail to draw the consequences.

Quote:

They took an idea, that turned into a belief, that turned into a religion, that became an institution, that turned the ideas into morals, that then became rules, that then became laws. And from those laws was born the device to enforce those laws - Government.

I don't know how much Zen opposes other types of Buddhism, but it certainly started with a religion (with morals and beliefs) and its social institutions (monks etc.), and it emphasized some existing and accepted ideas.

Quote:
So my ancestors took an idea called Zen. It wasn't popular at all at the time, but people soon found they liked the idea. Through generations Zen was handed down by word of mouth and became a way of life taught to believers of the idea. Soon vast communities of Zen believers began to gather on certain occasions. They built peaceful domed structures with beautiful waterfalls and gardens that hosted the gatherings. Soon the Zen-Followers built their homes to the likeliness of the great beautiful temples with the flowing waterfalls and beautiful gardens.

Great beautiful temples and homes for all exist only in pre-economic fairyland.
In the real world only a rich minority can have beautiful buildings and gardens; the others get by with a beautiful soul.

Quote: Decades pass and the ancestors found themselves becoming offended on a deep level when followers did not practice the core principals of Zen,

Why? Falling from a Golden Age requires a very good reason, not the mere passing of decades.

Quote: ... so they created a written code of the principals of Zen. The Zen (as the code was called) still survives to this day, although not as widely followed I might add.

The written "code" would be short, unimpressive and unneeded.

Quote: It was a way of life that allowed them to prosper in peace and dignity. But then something happened - individualism was born into the society of the Zen Followers and some people were not following The Zen way of life.

This is where you clearly deform a personal religious attitude, with many intrinsically individualistic aspects (seeking one's own illumination in the privacy of reflections and meditations), into a fundamentalist religious society with a lot of rules.

Quote: So the Zen followers put the code into law, that made consequences for those who blatantly ignored The Zen. They created the system of elected officials that managed the laws of the state that is the base for what we have today.

The Government created prospered and grew and welcomed all outsiders under the condition that they follow the core laws created from the morals of that belief.

This reminds me of islamic law and feels completely out of place.

Quote: And then, something funny happened. To appease the new people who had their own religion, the government that was born of the rules that were created form the morals that the people learned through their religion, separated the religion from the state. The Government and the people became two separate entities.

This is the process that started in Europe a few centuries ago after bloody wars between different Christians and isn't yet complete.
Whatever your beliefs are, I wouldn't call it funny.
You directly contradict the later paragraphs about abstracting the law away from "Zen" principles: it is required to appease people of other religions, separating church and state isn't enough.

Quote:
OK, so a hundred years later and outsiders start to see how truly great the essence of the Zen culture was. They immigrated in droves, bringing their own beliefs, morals, and religions with them.This caused much strife and conflict, and since the Zen Followers were not ones to kick the immigrants out, they proposed that they change the Government to incorporate all of the different moral standards that everyone held. Through much debate the Zen Followers decided that the core reason for the unhappiness was that the government laws were based on the Zen moral system.

Debate? You need to choose between a blissful anarchy of debating nice people and a strong government able to deal with "strife and conflict".

Quote: They concluded that these laws should have nothing to do with religion and they were just rules to follow while living in the state. So the Zen Followers declared that from then on the government's laws were based on rules that kept everyone living in harmony, not based on the principles of Zen idealism. This is an important part of our history to take note of. We have our citizens that follow the moral code because it is part of their religious idealism, but we have a government that severed the link between morals and laws. In the beginning it didn't matter too much because the laws still strongly reflected the morals. But when new laws were made... well, you'll see...

The Government trying not to let their religion guide them started to make immoral decisions, these immoral decisions started to make the Government look immoral and corrupt in the eyes of the still quite religious and moral people.

One wonders who the government officers are. If they are a democratic representation of the people, how can they become collectively immoral? Individual free thinkers and evil people would be voted away and replaced with someone orthodox and dependable.

Quote: We started noticing a change in how things were run. Our elected officials started lying to us, telling us what we needed to hear. They told us they were still the same people, they still followed The Zen, but they weren't. They became Politicized Zens with a heavily distorted view from ours. How could it not be? In order to get elected, they had to be Zen Followers to us, but in order to get us what we wanted out of our government they had to go from an explicitly un-Zen stand point.

This doesn't make sense. Politicians often turn out to be more radical or more bendable than their electors expected, but each citizen is going to vote either a pious conservative that would promote lapsing religious values or a responsible liberal that would make concessions to reduce inter-religious tensions: whoever wins, there can be a strong opposition, not a contradictory double standard.

Quote: Hence their view became (much to their misery I might add) highly contradictory of it's self. The first generation of politicos were distraught and were afraid to do what was needed to keep our growing state stable, they did nothing but keep the status quo. The next generation of politicians was where it started going downhill. We needed schools, we demanded an education to better ourselves. So they gave them to us.

But the government ran the schools that did not teach the moral people's children the moral laws the government was originally based off of. It had to teach it's future citizens how to live well and happy within the system's boundaries. An ever growing rift between each generation developed. Each generation lost a bit of their morality from their teachings. Each generation horrifying it's predecessor.

Cultural, social and political changes tend to be slow and steady (e.g. women rights movements) or sometimes intense but quickly exhausted (e.g. the collapse of Communist regimes in eastern Europe).
The horrification of multiple generations of citizens is quite unlikely; there would be serious consequences very soon.

Quote:
Here I sit, two-hundred and fifty years later, witness to a small part of our destructive cycle started back when our government abandoned our ideals. Small part, but big enough to get an idea of exactly how destructive of a cycle. We are in a cold standoff, us versus them. Us versus the outsiders destroying Zen, us versus the Government that has become so powerful it can be felt seeping into every capillary and pore of our society, us pitted against ourselves. It's no mystery to me how we got this way. Simple logic really. When our government abandoned our ideals and then gave us schools, we no longer had that much control over what we taught our offspring, we especially lost that ability when they required the young to go to school. Had to keep everyone smart and following the law. Well, the next part goes like this - those kids raised, taught, and socialized in the government schools grew up smart and strong. Some of them became our next politicians. They had learned to be better politicians than the last batch before them. Their views were a little more distorted and they changed some laws here and there. Small steps. They changed some laws having to do with the economy, some with the judicial system, and some with the education system. More requirements here, more restrictions there. Their successors were terrifying from an absolute perspective, but they were simply just acceptably worse than their predecessor from a relative point of view. As far as society (as opposed to what was happening inside the government) ... it went down the shit hole, for lack of better imagery. We thought it was just the pretentious teenager years, raging hormones and all that jazz. But every generation managed to horrify it's preceding generation in completely new ways every time. Nobody thought to ask what the hell was going on in those schools. Complacency has since replaced curiosity. They never got better, just worse. A cycle of the blind leading the blind if you will, is what has really been happening. This cycle started over ten generations ago. That's a lot of revolutions in our little spinning social cog. But the time for talk is drawing to an end, its time to act. Didn't you know? A revolution is starting.

You have to be more concrete. What happened? What is the revolution for? Who are the good guys and bad guys? What's the world like?

Lorenzo Gatti