Yeah the bottom line is are you making this for yourself or other people to play.
Adding too much realism in games aren't as fun as people think. Video games are meant to be fun. So anything that prevents people from having fun, e.g. seeing their own entities get destroyed by their own projectiles, should be taken into consideration.
You could just brush that off and say that this is how you want your game. That's your choice, that's your game.